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I'm not sure if anyone wants to know, or cares for that matter, but I'm just getting it out there - Someone needs to...

Friday, October 19, 2012

Things are going well - other than the fact that I am quarentined...  I'm infected.  Damn.  Antibiotics, steroids, and the common Kentucky crud accessories...

I'm going to be a "Nielson Family" - they bribed me for a whole 5 dollars cash...  I'm easy....LMAO!!!

Going to get some more rest.  Have a blessed day.  :-)

Monday, October 15, 2012

Well, my laptop decided to take a shit today, however, I am fairly confident that I have corrected the machine's malfunction.

Anyways - It's almost 02:30 in the morning, and I find myself not tired in the least.  I think that a slice of homemade cheesecake is in order.

Sorry to Cyndi because Saturday night got all FUBAR.  Won't get into it here, but it was just horrible timing...  I am so sorry, my friend.  Perhaps a trip to see Mason down in Florida is in order, with a layover in Fayetteville, NC...  More to come on this...

Marshmallow and HOO-B (Hooker Bitch) are settled into the townhouse.  They are being good kitty cats for the most part...  :-)  Love my kittehs.

Glad that everything down in central Florida is okay.  That takes a lot of stress off of me.  Waiting for Oogi's school pictures to be sent to A.

I am still recovering from my 01 OCT move from NKY...  Right ankle been swollen pretty good, and my knees and lower back are still in quite a bit of pain. NO PAINKILLERS!  So proud of myself.  Other than when the ENT clinic physician prescribed them a year ago tomorrow for my Open Septorhinoplasty... Other than those pills, I have been OPIATE pill-free for 2 years come 04 DEC.  Yea me!!!!

So now that a lot of things have been completed, I can finally relax...

Will make an effort to keep this damn thing up to date. 

Everyone have a great and blessed day. 

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

I've had a lot on my mind lately.  Big changes.  I'm not sure what I want to write about all of this, yet, I feel that it is time to get a few things out of my head. 

1 - I am not crazy.
2 - My sanity is on scales, and it's difficult to keep em balanced.
3 - I will be roaming down to the ville soon to hang out and wait on Social Security... Beats sitting in Covington.
4 - I am in the process of my recovery that I refuse to be held back from my addiction any longer!!!  I am going to go out, enjoy life, and I really DGAF what people think about me or what I am doing.  I may be old and crippled, but I am still an AWESOME guy!!!
5 - Not sure what is in store for the rest of my life, but, I am going to live my life on MY TERMS, and if that is not acceptable to certain people, see #4.
6 - Everyone needs to KCCO during this time.  I am going to KCCO no matter how bad shit gets.
7 - I am OWNING my thoughts and feelings, and once again, I really DGAF what people think.

Everyone KCCO, and will update y'all as all this shit happens.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Damn there is so much stuff going through my brain right now...  A lot of decisions that I have to make...  Think I'm gonna take a break from all these things for a while, and do some things that I want to do.

For example - I am gonna make Marshmallow his own website.  I also want to go out and take some more photos and learn this damn software.  I also want to learn how to brew beer.  I think that I also want to start volunteering again...  Not as a firefighter, but perhaps assisting individuals who are less fortunate than myself.

Ahh...  Gordon Lightfoot...  Great music...

Good night, all...  Til next time...

Monday, July 16, 2012

Was definitely an informative visit.  A lot of talking, a lot of exchanging of thoughts.  Been up for going on 36 hours no sleep, but it was kinda nice to know that I still have a parent who cares...  More to come later, but for now, good night.

Sunday, June 24, 2012

My sleep hygiene is not great at all...  I'm not sure what's going on with it, but I feel like I need to start getting on some type of schedule.

Secret Agent Kitty is doing well...  When I get paid, I need to get him some more toys... Laser pointer is a must!  He craves attention, though...  Guess that's not a bad thing.

I'm in the middle of rearranging my apartment... I just don't like everything the way it is right now...

Lot's to do, and lot's to get out here, but can't right now.  Hope everyone has a wonderful and blessed day!

Friday, June 22, 2012

Damn, I miss firefighting...  I miss serving...  I miss helping others...  Yes, it screwed up my head pretty bad, and I got hurt a few times, and probably taken A LOT of unnecessary risks, but I always felt deep down inside, that I was put on this earth to take care and help other people regardless of whether or not my life was in danger.

I feel as if that was my calling from God...

However, God and I still have some issues to resolve...  I had a Chaplain tell me about a year or so ago that I am, "...further along in my spiritual journey,"  than I realize...  I still search for answers to this very day...

It's funny how PTSD and religion are closely related.  Out of all the counseling, therapy, treatment, and research, I still seek answers.  I have been told that I should just simply accept everything for what it is, however, I am not satisfied with that.

Am I searching for the meaning of life, and just not realize it?  I honestly don't know, but I have spent many sleepless nights trying to figure things out...  I still can't.  Perhaps if I keep searching, I will find it...  At the very least, I will find an answer or explanation that will at least satisfy me...  My personal truth, perhaps...

Maybe I need more spiritual guidance from the church...  Maybe I should continue to study the Bible?

I so desire to know what is on the other side...  Death is a part of life, so do we continue to "live" after we pass on?  Do I get a "free pass" since I have helped so many people in their time of need?  Why would God let me experience a little child's flesh "melting" through my gloved hands?  What lesson does that teach me?

I have so many questions, and hardly any answers...