I wanted to get this out there, and I really don't give a flying f - - k what anyone thinks.

DAD - I know I am not the model son by any stretch of the imagination.  I know I have been one huge disappointment after another.  I know that I'm a f--k up.  I want you to know that I miss you.  I love you, even though you may not love me.  I am sorry.  There are A LOT of things that you do not know, and I feel that you should.  However, I won't get into those details on here (too personal).

I have A LOT of things wrong with me.  I am not making excuses, but mental illnesses mess with ones mind and behavior.  PTSD, depression, bi-polar, and a couple others that I have been diagnosed with.  I have been off of drugs for going on 2 years now, and I have to tell you some things.  Whether or not you choose to believe them, is irrelevant to me.  I just want the opportunity to tell you.  Maybe alot more things would make a little more sense.

Anyways, dad, I am sorry.  I love you, and I miss you.  I hope that one day, we can have a relationship that really defines a father and son.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGDA0Hecw1k&feature=colike